One thing is for sure, no one gets out of here alive. Life demands so much of us. The last words from my dying gran were, “life is a series of challenges to be overcome.” At the time I thought, what an odd and slightly negative thing to say — but it is true.

You don’t have to accept the challenge. Maybe it is not for you like ballet or climbing mountains, yet just like the ballerina and the mountaineer, you are going to need a measure of grit and grace.

Grit. I like the word. It represents resiliency and…

Do you know how the flight attendant says put your oxygen mask on first? There’s a reason for that. In the unlikely event of an accident if you’re dead to the world; if you’re slumped unconscious who will save the metaphorical baby?

You may not realise it but you’re running on empty. Not just air — but love. I get it: you’re a mother, sister, brother, husband, boss, friend. And everyone needs your attention. They deserve attention. In some cases, you’re all they’ve got. You take your responsibilities seriously and you’re there with a bucket of water to put out…

Growing one’s self-esteem is like sorting the wheat from the chaff. A sieving system where beliefs and actions and habits are brought to light to be examined and queried. Does this empower me or disempower me?

Do I want this or not?

Perhaps it is maturity but lately, I’ve been more discerning. I’ve been questioning the very atmosphere of expectations — social and personal — and whether I need to obey or not.

I’m cherry-picking.

When I look at the expectations in my hands I realise they don’t belong to me — they disintegrate in my calloused palms as if…

I don’t know how it happened — but I am a spinster. Still beautiful, mind you. I still turn heads in the supermarket. In the right light I can pass for ten years younger — but attracting a partner has little to do with looks. It is more about vibe and I guess I must give off a not-on-your-nelly vibe. For years, no one has asked me if I have a boyfriend. They assume I do not. No one questions my spinster status. It has now solidified.

I’ve had long relationships. And marriage proposals, but I turned them down. One…

Write until you bleed. Written in blood.

I can’t even find the right sentence to start this article. The underlying danger is tensing my gut. I daren’t write about the taboos, the secrets, the skeletons in the closet. I daren’t bare the gore of the ugly abandoned and scorned. The narcissists and drunkards, the sex addicts and drug lords the mental torture and children destroyed. I cannot tell you the truth about people I loved or how little, in truth, I was loved.

But when I read scary writing from the wounded; brave enough to stand up and be counted — it takes my breath away. I…

Oh yes. Who doesn’t like a good grudge? So nice to nurse on lonely nights when everyone else in the whole entire world is at a party and you’re not invited. At least you have your grudge. Feed him wee morsels of dead flies and worms. Keep him snuggled right up close to your heart.

I’m joking. But I sometimes think of grudges as little monsters. Like a badly made stuffed toy. A little gremlin or creature from myth. A breathing hungry wee mite that delights in misery.

But those grudges bite. They can take whole mouthfuls out of your…

“It’s hard to be a diamond in a rhinestone world.”
- Dolly Parton

It ain’t all roses and ice cream. Not all the time. We all come a-cropper, fall off our pedestal, encounter wolves in the woods, have bad hair days. We get grief-struck, love-struck, lose our nerve and look at that sharp snow-topped mountain and wonder — how will I ever climb that monstrosity?

Life can wear you down. A couple of hard knocks and you’re in need of reviving with some smelling salts. You’ve fainted in your long white lacy dress, at the foot of the staircase. It’s…

Last night I lay in bed contemplating how I might die. Will it be bloody and awful — or so swift I’d barely notice. When I was a child I used to wonder about death. I’d face my mortality and found it hard to fathom. Like a mystery — because it is mysterious. None of us knows when or how the end will arrive and none of us — is getting out of here alive.

When I was a little girl I’d marvel at the magnificent size of the universe and know myself to be the tiniest speck. I’d consider…